FIVE STEPS TO MOVING ON 09/26/2010
 "Letting go of someone dear to you is hard, but holding on to someone who doesn't feel the same is much harder...." T_T When I hear from someone who is going through a romantic breakup, my heart truly breaks for them. Someone they loved is no longer theirs to love and the sadness in their words tells of, not only heartbreak, but a loss of self as well. And this is the very reason why I’ve come up with this article on how to cope with Relationship break up and ultimately Move on. HERE ARE FIVE (5) STEPS THAT YOU CAN DO IN CASE YOU ARE INTO THIS KIND OF AWKWARD SITUATION: 1. FIRST THINGS FIRST. Whatever you do, don't let thoughts of making this person jealous, or thoughts of bitterness enter into your mind. You're much better than that! Just keep saying, "I'm moving on." Pretty soon, you will have done just that. Never underestimate the power of Words. Here’s a little experiment to prove my point..… Try telling yourself that you will not succeed and most likely it will happen….Haven’t you noticed that? Be careful with your WORDS because it is so powerful that it creates YOUR REALITY in the future. 2. HAVE THE PROPER MINDSET.. ACCEPT THAT THE RELATIONSHIP IS ALL OVER. Learn the lessons behind it instead. And to wrap things up between you and your ex bf/gf, forgive her/him for what happened. More importantly, you should forgive yourself. This is the way to go. You should FORGIVE for selfish reasons. Removing the “excess baggage” in your heart is literally good for the heart. You also need to unload in order to welcome your NEW LIFE with a more positive aura. Otherwise, you’ll always look clumsy and miserable. In which case, you’ll have difficulty in moving on and get back to your old jolly lovable self. Here’s something that you might want to know: If you project an image of “Abundance (for love), everybody will want to take part of it and who knows… that includes your ex. However if you project an image of “Scarcity (for Love), everyone will shy away from you. WHY? Bcoz THAT’S THE LAW OF ATTRACTION. It’s a natural law and it contains universal truths similar to the LAW OF GRAVITY.. You defy it and you destroy “the order of the universe”.. or to be specific, you destroy your chance of moving on.. ultimately you destroy yourself.. J 3. GET RID OF ALL THOSE SENTIMENTAL ITEMS. And this means deleting his number from your cell phone, throwing out the pictures of you two together, blocking him from your social networking site accounts. Don’t torture yourself with constant reminders. Keep those will only serve to put you in state of prolonged nostalgia. And it’s not going to help you attain your objective. CLICK HERE TO READ THE REST OF THE ARTICLE On Forgiveness vs. Bitterness 09/17/2010
 How Long Have You Been Angry? Here’s the truth: Bitterness and anger is one and the same thing. But Bitterness is anger past its expiry date. Let me illustrate. I love spaghetti. Served hot, it’s wonderful. But left on the kitchen counter for a whole day, it may still be good but be careful. After two days, you may get an upset stomach. After one week, there’ll be more germs than spaghetti. At that point, the plate of spaghetti has become poison Just like anger. If anger stays too long in your heart, your anger no longer heals but kills. When anger turns into bitterness, it’s poison. The Bible says, “the sun must not go down in your anger.” I believe it. Except perhaps for severe wounds (like abuse, betrayal, etc.), In forgiveness you need to be Angry but it should not last for more than a day. I’m talking about the regular hurts we encounter everyday. Before nightfall, move onto Stage two. But deeper wounds may need weeks or even months of anger and grief. For deeper wounds, I believe there’s no clear divide between Stage One and Two. There’ll be an overlap. But your movement must be towards Stage Two. Because that’s where the real magic happens. Stage Two: Release Anger In Stage Two, you decide to forgive. Key word: Decide. It’s not about feeling, but about willing. The feelings of anger can linger (that’s normal) but the decision has already been made in your heart. Remember, Love is a decision, not just a feeling. If forgiveness is love, then forgiveness is a decision too. But here’s a very important footnote: Forgiveness isn’t necessarily bringing back the relationship to where it was before. If you caught your boyfriend cheating on you, what should you do? Forgive him! But that doesn’t mean you have to get back with him again. That’s all up to you. Let’s say you caught your boyfriend cheating on you twice. What should you do? Again, you have to forgive him. Now, do you get back into his arms? If you’re a psychotic with sadomasochistic tendencies, go ahead. Your desires will be granted. Forgiveness is also not opening up yourself to more hurt. For example, if your alcoholic husband beat you up, you still need to forgive him; But do you go back into the house? No way. You run away and never see him until he gets counselling and stops drinking for 6 months. A Simple lesson About letting Go 09/11/2010
 Letting go is one of the hardest lessons in life. There are so many things that we have to learn to let go. We have to let go of situations, things, memories, people and even ourselves. It's easy to form an attachment to people and things. When you've formed an attachment to people and things, it can be a very painful experience and feeling when you realized that it's time to let go. Even the mere thought of not having that person or thing in your life just squeezes your heart in pain. At this point I would like to show you a short video so that you'll know exactly what i mean. Please click this link:  One day, a young woman came to her grandfather and cried on his shoulder. She told him of her many problems. She felt so overwhelmed by them. It seemed like everything in her life was going wrong. After she wept many tears, the old man told her, “Let’s go to the kitchen. I have something to show you.” In the kitchen, the grandfather prepared three pots of water on the cooking range. On the first pot, he placed carrots. On the second pot, he placed eggs. On the third pot, he placed coffee beans. And he lit the fire beneath each of them. For twenty minutes, they sat in silence as the fire heated the pots. After twenty minutes, the grandfather said, “If you notice, the fire underneath the pots are the same. Same heat. Same temperature. Yet you’ll notice how different things react to the fire.” He fished out the carrots and placed it in a bowl. He made his granddaughter touch it. “It’s soft,” she said. He got an egg, broke it, and gave it to her. “Hard boiled,” she said. Finally, he opened the coffee pot—its fragrance filling the room. He poured a cup for her. She took a sip. “That’s nice,” she said, “thanks, grandpa. But what does this all mean?” He said, “Child, you’re going through fire. You’re going through trials. Everybody does. But how are you reacting? Are you like the carrot who thought it was hard and strong, but when the fire came, it became weak and lost all its strength? Or are you like the egg that had a malleable spirit and a tender heart, but when trials came, hardened its heart? Or are you like the coffee bean? The fire released its flavor and aroma. Your trials can release your gifts and dreams. Your trials can set you free. So tell me, are you a carrot, an egg, or coffee beans?” Your Trials Can Set You Free Did your boyfriend leave you for another girl? You’re now free to find a better man who’ll be faithful to you. Were you laid off at work? You’re now free to get a better job at a better company or become an entrepreneur. Are you sick right now? This is a wake up call. Your body is telling you, “It’s high time to care for me.” You’re now free to become the healthiest person you can become. When Faced with trials, BE LIKE THE COFFEE BEANS that spread its wonderful flavor and aroma in the midst of the heat of Life's DIFFICULTIES... and that includes your LOVELIFE also..:) See you next blog. -Dr. Badlove, GS Let's Talk About Pains 09/10/2010
 I know people don’t like pain. I know I don’t. We avoid it at all costs. That’s why many people avoid diets, doctors, and dentists. Because we don’t like pain. But let me give you a startling fact. You need pain to survive. You need pain to succeed in life. In fact, all permanent success comes from pain. Any success that doesn’t come from pain will be short-lived. Check out Lotto Winners. Yesterday, I was reading the story of Michael, a garbage collector who won $15 Million from Lotto. But after just a few years, he lost all his money and is now trying to get his old job back as a garbage collector. Another guy named Jack won a staggering $315 Million from Lotto. But he too lost everything after less than 10 years. But he didn’t only lose the money—he also lost his family. They’re not alone. Go ahead, google “Lotto winners lose money” and you’ll get hundreds of true-to-life tragic stories. Easy come, easy go. I repeat: Real success comes from pain. If it didn’t come from pain, it isn’t real success. Perhaps by now you have a hurtful experience in LOVE.. but here's the good side of it... the next time around... you'll be a lot wiser than you were before in terms of selecting the right person to love. Also you'll become a more loving person because you know how it was to be hurt by someone you love. In return the rightful person will love you even more for that... AND YOU TWO WILL BE HAPPILY IN LOVE and who knows be a lifetime partner.... i've said my piece... hope this gives you something to be grateful about the PAINS OF LIFE, specifically LOVE PAINS... See you next blog. -Dr. Badlove, GS | AuthorI'm Dr. Badlove, GS ArchivesCategoriesAll |
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